00:00:26 John Daub: Is it me or does the sound of clippers bring fear into the hearts of everybody who has hair? If you're not in the military, do you really need a tool like this or a dog or any kind of animal for that matter? I'm not an animal. At least I don't think I am, but I do look like one because for the last six months or so, my hair has been out of control. It looks like Angkor Wat where the trees are just all completely twined into the man-made structures that are me. The hair are vines. It's really grown on me, very much so, to a point where I just cannot maintain it anymore. Even with a hat, it's all over the place. And you, my wife, and everybody else that I know in town knows that this is a disaster except for me.

00:01:21 John Daub: I've listened to some of you who've told me that it doesn't look too bad. I mean, I could probably just grow it out and in a year or two, who knows what it would look like. We don't even have to do this at all. But it has to be done because I just can't focus like this. And look, I have a reputation and sometimes these things just have to be done. So we're going to live stream this and I hope that you learn what not to do ever. Things should be dramatic. Who wrote that? Chris Dickerson. Absolutely, it should be dramatic. I can't chicken out now. No, I'm not going to look like Peter von Gomm. Shane has provided funds for me to fix this.

00:02:06 John Daub: But I want to tell everybody this before we start. First of all, I want to say thank you so much for supporting the channel. The last three months have been really, really hard, not just on us, on our family, but on yours and you out there. I've been doing a lot of stuff, confined inside my apartment, like camping in my living room, delivering all sorts of foods, just trying to find content to not just keep you entertained and maybe bring a little bit of a smile to you and your family, maybe give you ideas on how you can survive too. But also, it was very important for us to do this as well. It gave us something to think about, to plan and do, and it was a lot of fun for us as well. And I hope that you enjoyed the last two, three months of being stay-at-home John viewers. But I have to make sure I keep my hair wet. There are rumors that it might not grow back. The rumors started by you guys.

00:03:08 John Daub: And I've incorporated memberships here on the channel. And I think that if you are supporting with memberships, all of the membership fees, 100% of it, will be given to a charity called NPO Florence. It's a nonprofit that helps children, babies that are in a really difficult situation, parents that are struggling to take care of their kids and families that need help to make sure that mothers that are working too much, that their kids are well provided for. I thought it was a really good charity. So all of the membership fees for the month of June—it's still June. So I encourage you to sign up, not just for me, but for that. And I think it's a good thing we can do for our community.

00:03:53 Kanae Daub: I was tested positive for COVID-19 on Tuesday, Rivera Gang.

00:03:57 John Daub: I'm really sorry to hear that. I hope that this can maybe bring a little bit of cheer to your everyday life. See the new world because the last hair bender John. All right. Let's see if I can do this myself. How does it work? Just do it.

00:04:26 John Daub: Whoa. It's real now. Wow. Oh, can I? I don't think I can do this. They said to give it a little arc. Oh, that looks better. I don't know. I'm doing it. It's just like on the internet videos. Wow. I fixed it. Nice. I can just stop here. We can do like a samurai thing. Maybe. Look, that looks pretty good. I'm actually proud of this. It is so much cleaner. This used to be too long. Let me get rid of this. I'm going to connect. Can you help me? You said that you're really excited about this.

00:05:32 Kanae Daub: Glenn's using the dedicated emoji for this for members here.

00:05:41 John Daub: Let me just get rid of this part. I'm really proud of myself. Look, I'm doing it. Internet, I'm doing it. I better let a professional do it. Look at that. That's totally different. Wow. All right. So I kind of made a mess. I want just a little off the sides and on the back. It should be wet enough. Let's kind of give this. You know what? Start with the back and just completely obliterate it because the mullet has got to go. The mullet has got to go.

00:06:32 Kanae Daub: You don't need the clothes?

00:06:34 John Daub: Oh, yeah. That's right. Hey, this is not funny. I saw this on TV. I can't believe I'm doing this. Is there? Can I go back on this? No, I can't. This is it. All right. Just do it. Hold on. They can't see the side. How do I do this? Let me get the light here. That's pretty good.

00:07:42 Kanae Daub: But you want to keep here, right?

00:07:44 John Daub: I hope so. You hope so? What do you mean? You have a professional touch. Just the way you touch my head like that. It feels good.

00:07:56 Kanae Daub: You having fun?

00:07:58 John Daub: Yeah. Really? This is my first experience.

00:08:01 Kanae Daub: Wait. What? You've never done this before? Yeah. Of course. This is my first experience.

00:08:04 John Daub: She's never done this before. Okay. Just a little off the sides. Around the ear? You know what? Just get rid of it all. But not on the top. No, I'm not going in the military. Although, thank you for your service. Just do it. Remember all those mean things I said about you when you weren't around? This is your chance to get your revenge.

00:08:43 Kanae Daub: I have.

00:08:45 John Daub: Yeah. I can keep this hair like this. Oh, you got a hairpin. That's smart. I saw YouTube.

00:08:54 Kanae Daub: You saw this on YouTube?

00:08:56 John Daub: Yes. No, you're doing it backwards. You don't hold it like this. You didn't even know that? No, you hold it like this. The hair goes through here. No, you don't do it like this. You do it like this. I do like this? Yeah. Oh. Oh, no. I think I did right. Should I do this myself? Yeah. But do it slowly. Do it with love. You don't even know how to use the clippers. You said you were joking that you said you don't know how to do it. I thought you were joking. Are you even cutting hair? No, you have to just get into it like this. Just really lay into it.

00:10:01 John Daub: Do you all know the story of Samson? He lost his hair. Delilah cut off his hair. And you know what happened? He lost his powers. I don't think that's going to happen. That's really nice hair. There's not a lot of gray in this part. Yeah, lay into it. You really get it. So I used to talk to Charlie, my dog. He would attack the mailman with vigor. But he had energy and passion. I shouldn't talk to Kanae the same way I talk to the dog, though. Don't get it, Kanae. We're having so much fun. Don't be scared for me. I deserve it. All right. How does it look? Does it look good? It looks kind of spotty, though like I'm a patient from a psych ward now.

00:11:04 John Daub: It's sort of not that, you know, kind of, I guess this is the transition period where you're just not sure. So I can take it to the other side here. Is it like mowing the grass? Tanoshii (fun). Sometimes get the, sometimes clean it out, you know. You have to clean it like, that's a lot of hair. That's clumps. It's coming out in clumps. Oh my. How is it? You're getting good. Remember, I saw it on the internet videos like this. I can see it. You missed the spot. Yeah. Oh, good. Look at the focus and the concentration. Oh, oh, oh, no, nothing, nothing, nothing. No, you're getting, now you're getting into the side here. Okay. This side, the, let's examine your work here. All right. First of all, wow. Look at that gray. I did not know that that was underneath there. Well, call me the silver fox.

00:13:01 John Daub: All right. We gotta get rid of this. We can work on this here. Well, what is this? This is like a sideways mullet. This is a side mullet. Yeah. Just get rid of the side mullet. No side mullets. Yeah. Oh, do it slowly. Cause it's scaring me. You're really getting up there next to my ear. Oh wow. That's a chunk. That's really, really a lot. All right. Even out this part, it's a chunk. This is a part here, this looks like a patient that, a mental hospital. I'm sweating. Oh. This looks, the mullet's gone. The mullet's gone. All right, do it. Do it. Good. It's a good sound. That sounds like the barber shop. That's a positive thing.

00:14:20 Kanae Daub: Oh. I can show your head now.

00:14:22 John Daub: You can see my head? Yeah. Did you say you can see skin?

00:14:28 Kanae Daub: No skin.

00:14:31 John Daub: No skin. All right. This is a Panasonic for those, there's some people. I tried reading the instruction manual. It's all in Japanese. So. Did you study how to do this before?

00:14:47 Kanae Daub: Yeah, I saw YouTube.

00:14:51 John Daub: Do you have a comb? Yeah, we have. This is real punk. This is punk, man. Oh, this is so punk. Nice. Yo, what's up? I dig this. This is so punk. Hey, can we just stop here? What do you think? Just stop here. How you doing? It's like, I want to maybe just stop there. Just leave it, leave it one side long, as a memory, a memorial, maybe, to the rest. No, people, the internet's saying no, don't do that. Don't add, who's using the PBG emoji? I got, I still got some left. Okay? We're not doing that. I'm not doing the top much, so much. Wait, I still got, there's a mini mullet. Yeah. I think it's too long. Oh, okay. All right. Do what you can with this one.

00:15:46 John Daub: I've been going to the same barber for 14 years. He's going to kill me when he sees this. And I'm not kidding you. He knows her, right? He knows, you know my barber.

00:15:59 Kanae Daub: Simon. Simon.

00:16:01 John Daub: He's going to completely freak when he sees me tomorrow or Monday. Yeah. Let me tell you how nice my barber is. It's better than before.

00:16:11 Kanae Daub: Really?

00:16:12 John Daub: Yeah. I guess so. Peso, glad to see you reintegrated into society. This is the first time. I was in society, wasn't I? Is it okay? You want to keep here? Well, Peso said society. That means no, because society looks down on. You're going to miss this. Will I? Will you? I'm okay. You know, Samson's lover did it when he was sleeping. Then he woke up with no hair. Just do it. Look, don't look back now. That's what the hats are for. Just do it. Just do your best. I'll do it. Wow. Maybe get rid of some of the grass. Did you ever cut grass before, Kanae? You don't even have a front lawn, do you?

00:17:16 Kanae Daub: No. Do you have a lawnmower? No. Do you ever cut grass? No.

00:17:21 John Daub: No? Oh my word. Sometimes the lawnmower, you have to empty the bag, okay? If you don't, you can break the lawnmower. That's why nothing's coming out. She's never cut hair and she's never mowed a lawn.

00:17:43 Kanae Daub: I cut my hair.

00:17:44 John Daub: You cut your own hair?

00:17:45 Kanae Daub: Yeah.

00:17:52 John Daub: Okay. It's something. Well, I don't know. That's something. This is hard. You grains. Hey, what is it? Let's do the horror. Let's think about it. Horror. Horror, it could happen in every way. Yeah, really? I don't know if it's here. Yeah, do it. Yeah, around the ears. But don't cut the ears. You know what I mean? Feel me? Your style is a little funky there. Okay. Hey. Yeah. Use the comb. They're saying comb it out. It'll get rid of the. Yeah, I see. You know, this is a bad situation when the internet is giving you comments on how to cut your hair. We did not. This is so wrong. John is getting the Tintin. It's too long. All right, you know what? Look, just go around it, okay? Just go around it. Now you have a line. All right. Okay. Okay, just. Yeah. This is the way we do it. I did. This also stops her from doing the. This way she can't. Yeah, get rid of mini mullet. Yeah. Good. Good. Very good. This is so bad. Just cut her hair. Just go around it. Does the bowl help? It's still long there. Okay. I think I'm going to use short one. All right. This is World War II style here. World War I. Careful. We're going to need to get a bigger pot. How is it? It feels pretty long back there. Yeah, pretty long. All right. Keep doing. Yeah. Keep doing. Um. With that clipper until we can't get it anymore. All right. Comb it out. Comb it out. Empty the bag. Empty the bag. Look, Edward Scissorhands back there.

00:20:48 Kanae Daub: Scissorhands?

00:20:49 John Daub: Yeah, you're just going at it. You're not even. Like. The various lengths of. Various lengths. It's not bad. Yeah, look, I'm 46. It's not going to last forever. Nothing lasts forever. You want to cut here? Maybe a little bit. I can't go with the raised. A little bit. This is funny. Just take. What's funny? This is funny part. Oh, that? Did you ever cut. Wait, did you ever cut hair before? Did you ever cut, like, that part of the hair before?

00:21:37 Kanae Daub: No.

00:21:38 John Daub: You never did. Why are you doing. What are you doing with my hair? You're not getting a tip. All right, you know what? This is scaring me. You're scaring me. Okay, just. You know what? When you cut this, you want to comb it straight, and you can just go like this. Okay. What are you. What is. No, no, what are you doing? What are you doing? Where did you learn how to do this? This. What are you using your hands for? Where's the comb? The comb? Okay, okay. What are you doing? I see the YouTube. You saw. How many YouTube videos did you watch? Like, one? Maybe five? Five? John has zero trust in Kanae. No! And before we even started this, I said that I will hold this against her, which is the reason why we haven't done this for months. Because if she messes up, it's very hard not to. I'm sure that it'll grow, and I'll let go. But it's really hard. Hard. It's. All right. You having fun? Really? Really? It does look better on the sides. It feels lighter. It still doesn't. They're long. Yeah. You know what? I think. I think we're just gonna have to let the barber do that part, because you're scaring the heck out of me. All right. You want to take it down? Let's go a little bit closer. So did you do everything you can?

00:23:19 John Daub: I think you can do more here, Kanae. Okay. Oh, yeah. Here? Here? Oh, yeah. Yeah. You're doing a great job, honey. Keep up the good work. This is called encouragement. Let me just get the sides, baby. Yeah. Don't. I. Just let it. Let it go. Skip the sides. This is all wrong. This is all wrong. Are you cleaning it out? You gotta. Yeah. Really. Really lay into it. And lay into it. Use the comb. Yeah, see? That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Stop fidgeting. She may slip. Oh, no. I can see. Don't say. Don't talk like that. How could I not fidget? All right. I'm not gonna fidget. I think it's okay. How come this side isn't. Because I used this side for here. Oh, really? It's all cut. You hear that, baby? That's the sound of success. All right. We're doing good. All right. Let's take this a little bit shorter. All right. It's dry. That's a good point. You don't want the hair. It should be dry. Let's wet the hair. Up. Get it in the sink. All right. Right now, we see on the floor a complete disaster. This is a war zone. Epic proportion. How'd that happen? Oh, my. Life will never be the same. Leave it dry. I think it should be dry on the sides. Okay. Actually, that looks pretty good. I don't mind it long on the top. I think this side is still needs to be butchered a little bit. The back looks pretty good. Actually, that's a pretty good job. But there's still kind of a mullet. Yeah. There's kind of a mullet. You want to do two blocks here? Let's just do it. Two blocks. So do we take it down to zero? Who does that? No, no. That's what these things are for here. All right. Let's take it to six. No, no, come away. Don't go to six. This has six. This has six? Yeah. That's nine, Kanae. Oh. All right. We're not doing it to three. Let's do six. I learned before. Look, I know. Don't take shortcuts. Things can go wrong. The Panasonic is really hard. I can do this. Really? You try it. All right. We're in the middle of a metamorphosis where I'm coming back to society. It felt. This way, though. This one is three, is it? Yeah. You flip it the other way, though. It's six. No, no, no. You try to put the three. No, no. I put six. I'm pretty sure. We're in a metamorphosis. We're now going down from 18 to three up here. It actually feels a lot different. I feel like my old self again, which is not saying a lot. It's not saying a lot. Does the internet know how to use this here? Oh, there we go. That's really short. No, it's three. I told you. No, the arrow is pointing to six, and this one says three. That's three. That's six. Wow. That's one of the very few times that I'm actually right. Yeah, and she's the one cutting my hair, so. No, you're right, honey. You're always right. Do you want to do six here? No, maybe. I don't know. Let's just see what happens. Okay, let's try. Let's see what happens. That's right, Tim. Yeah, do it back there. All right. Oh, good. What? What? What was that sound? What was that sound? You just went, oh. Yeah, it's kind of short. All right, it's okay. Just lay into it. I'm scared. Do that motion. It's too short. It is unblended. Is it better? Oh, that's pretty good. She's blending. Look at the technique. Do you see that? Stick and move. Stick and move. Stick and move. Stick and move. Can I? Stick and move. Stick and move. Stick and move. That sound. I like the sound of it. It feels good. That's good. Then, I won't get any of those lice or vermin. It feels lighter. It feels cooler. Another plus for summer. Well, don't be. If you do do it too short, it'll grow back. No, don't you even consider that. I got stuff I got to do with that hair. Look at the focus, the dedication. Is it nice? Is it good? Feels good. Let's see. Don't fidget. They said don't fidget. All right. Let's see. It's kind of very short here. I'm so scared. All right. Oh yeah. It is short. Yeah, I told you. Oh my gosh. That no, that's fine. I like it like that. Yeah, because that i like to play with it you know because i've been actually twirling yeah i've been twirling my hair especially the sideburns my hair would flap over my ears like a dog but now i can just go like this and it feels so soft like carpet feel it feels like carpet right it's nice why are you worried yeah i'm really worried why society people are gonna say look at him he looks so uneven all right oh really no if i see all right if i see only like this yeah you see the difference only here do you want me to hold it okay i'll hold it here it's very scary all right even it out baby do it yeah but i put it out it's better okay all right do it just let's let's get let's get this over with with 32 minutes in i can't believe this is 30 minutes long a good haircut probably takes two hours though i can't believe we only have 450 likes this is awful people hate this content stop right now it's gonna be all right i like this comment the best it's gonna be okay you've really calmed me down thank you thank you i like that you're doing a little flip flippity do flip buddy yeah that's what the other side looks like it's pretty good do you want you do you want the music can i oh no i need focus okay you focus do it do it baby what was that focus does it look good balanced mr das is here now we've really begun some of you doubted that we would do this how dare you okay what about on this side here can we do something about that it's an artist right there did you see that the focus nice this is your work you have to sign it up i can't see back there tell me what's going on everybody i don't know what this music is that's all i had you want something happy i might have happy music hold on okay hold on happy how's this it's my royalty free music okay we're getting we're playing some more musics here it feels good really yeah what okay here we go how's this all right i feel like i can't i can't stop fidgeting i can't stop fidgeting yeah ah does it look better no all right comb it out now gary says listen to gary thanks gary how you doing thank you for your other voice she thanks you gary so do i yes all right oh pretty good it's pretty good this side looks a little bit longer right there there's like a little flippity doodah thing going on here what do you think oh wait you can do it by yourself no i don't want to do it by myself you have to finish it's my responsibility yeah really okay you know what hold on let's go middle of the road here uh we're gonna go with a niner three is clean uh nine is mean twelve is green there you go you're getting good at this all right let's give let's give the right side a good sweep with the with the twelve yes yeah i can hear it good job good girl what's up though more i don't know you know i can't see myself i'm looking at the screen can you see motto motto writes in dutch universe okay all right the chump says listen to kanai i'm going to do that a cst fusion switch the camera angle to the back please jeff ang hi john kanae looks really good really peso's red will be there forever thank you pesew kelvin black enjoying this on our very own lgc9 you're not watching this in glorious 65 inches oh my word kelvin black what also my wife and i just collaborated to cut my own hair last week and kanai cuts a new series yeah this cut is not going to grow back anytime soon like ever it'll probably take three months or so ranjit's here hey ranjit nice to see you misty wright's in here i cut hair ask me if you have any questions stay still okay misty misty says don't move david kuma doesn't remember thanks guys all this is going to charity the beatles thank you yvonne thank you mr das rivera gang like the video everyone rivera gang yes please like it sunnyja everything's going to be all right that's my favorite comment so far though dear mew o'sullivan is rocking give us a house tour next rivera i've given you a house tour every time i've every time i've gotten food but maybe we'll do that the youtube oscar goes to john yeah i am acting scared to death the bowl is worth another that's a sharp chelsea actually yeah chelsea is also the name of the gimbal r.i.p quarantine hair r.i.p mullet becca ortiz cosmin's here hey cosmin yeah this is pretty crazy okay we finished yeah now you're big time nervous no worries all in one time have our first time haircut at home it's going to look awesome right sin the suijin wan king wong is here hey king john you have to stay still i'm reading this like way too late drunk saru that's for kanae and tene okay i'm not a drunk i'm a friend i'm a friend i'm a friend it might be better if it's longer yeah tony p's is cracking up tony michael turn the razor over right michael she got the question lee delvin thank you we got a lot of new members thank you isaac patu hey john enjoyed the stream in kichijoji ah missed it live had some good memories from my internship there greetings from montreal tony again is laughing faze life how do become travel member i don't know there's a different way there's a join button i put a link in the description you can go and check it out but there's a join button also on the computer version it's hard to see that if you're watching on the lg tv or a smartphone i think you have to be on an android or on the computer but there's a link if you're on ios that'll go to the same place i made a video about it explaining the levels inside of there thanks so much faye ben kelvin talo john kimura thanks for joining up bye bye all this is going to the npo florence jennifer french thank you john for entertaining us really this is entertaining riverre gang i hope you do feel better become the haircut last bender okay i think we caught up with the super chats guys i really want to say thank you danny's here thank you danny from quebec you remember danny right yes yes he's our maple syrup connection as well and has the most beautiful nieces in the entire world besides my nieces although that's pretty and thank you towards therapy writes an and dougan and uh i think i'll be okay here i think i'll be okay guys um michael roth writes in here permit i can't anymore bro it seems to be this an almoraz almuzaz 858 thank you what do you guys think is it it does look better though can i i kind of like it long i look like dicaprio in in one of his movies yeah beach the beach that's the worst dicaprio movie ever although i the book was good i look like caprio on the beach he was like 12 can i really if you can catch i look like him he had short hair and catch me if you can yeah i like that movie really she said i look like dicaprio in the beach really all right okay you want to do that with scissors with scissors maybe no no i'm kind of worried about around here okay all right we're gonna stop here i don't know what that is what kind of no you got to do something about this i know you're not with that use the scissors then you can do it i can do it what so it's my fault no i'm self-cutting myself okay my wife has given up now i'm into i'm stop i'm gonna stop too fix that oh my he's gonna kill me can i say medicine say medicine if you're watching i'm so sorry i'm coming in i'm coming in hot i'm like this is like top gun too say medicine i don't even know what this is how do i fix this okay is it okay you really you think so i look like shemp from three stooges hair will grow up quickly hair will grow up quickly yeah hope so too i hope so too it's just hair it's just hair okay really i think it's more than just hair it's just hair okay really i think it's more than just hair it's my power and now i'm powerless all right let's just check to see i still got it samson really yeah i was gonna go to bed like this all right sample can you how many feet are you you've got about 40 yen for today okay stop earlier you can't look from here alright prognosis negative i'll be able to live with this until i can get professional help so for those of you that have alright you know what it's manageable it didn't come out as bad as i thought it would be this back is really okay hold on the back is really short here hold on hold on hold on it's short oh my gosh kanae i told you what have you done oh it's fine it's fine oh wow it's fine it's okay it's not a problem at all okay alright no you know what oh my god it feels really nice though yeah alright i'm not gonna look at it i'm just gonna touch it it's military back here yeah it's michael schofield michael schofield how do you know these prison break references i look like michael here this part it's better than lincoln this part oh just that part just this part it's the same as where i go so i look like michael schofield from the back yeah what do i look like from the front alright guys thanks so much for supporting all the memberships and once again it's gonna be going to npo florence thanks so much for supporting it i put in the description of the video a little bit about that charity and kanae and i are going to be doing a lot of stuff we're gonna be going over there and talking with them and see if we can record they gave us they said that we can go over there right yes yes yeah they're gonna tell us a little bit about the charity and i just wanna say thank you to all of you for supporting that's really cool we'll try to do charity stuff with the memberships a few times a year and it's good for me to give i've been living here for 23 years and it's nice that we can use this to help my community because this actually helps us get better stories i like to think right if we help the people around us it'll help us when we have requests to please can we film maybe a little bit but i always think help out people especially in this really tough time because we've all been both of us have had a really tough time the last two three months inside and one of our viewers on discord recommended that we do this and it was really good we had a lot of suggestions from our viewers really good charities and nonprofit organizations that are helping families and this one looked like a really good one so thanks again other than that i'm gonna try to sleep on it and in the morning when i wake up or i wake up to get a midnight snack gosh forbid if i look in the mirror we'll always have this moment for the 1200 people watching this is a good time i'll probably have to take a shower do you like it kanae

00:48:56 Kanae Daub: Yeah, not bad.

00:48:59 John Daub: Yeah? You happy?

00:49:00 Kanae Daub: Yeah. I'm happy.

00:49:02 John Daub: Good. I'm happy. I feel like I'm whole again.

00:49:06 Kanae Daub: Yeah, you're like kind of new.

00:49:09 John Daub: I feel, what? I'm kind of new?

00:49:11 Kanae Daub: Yes, you have Einstein hair.

00:49:14 John Daub: I had Einstein hair?

00:49:16 Kanae Daub: Yes, but now you're new.

00:49:19 John Daub: I'm new? Oh my, okay. Alright, there you have it. I'm new now.

00:49:24 Kanae Daub: You're reborn.

00:49:25 John Daub: I'm reborn? Yeah. We should just keep this going and see what she'll say next. From Einstein to Michael Schofield. Alright, thank you for this compliment. We're going to clean up the house now. This should take us to like 1 in the morning or 2. There's a lot of hair. But once again, thanks guys. The subscription button is there if you want to as well. Support the channel. And by the way, I have a new channel coming next week with a formal announcement imminent. Those of you who discovered the channel are on Discord. See you next time. Good night from a new John. New John. That's crazy. Bye guys.