00:00:01 John Daub: What you see right there are the gangster deer of Nara. Nara, one of the most famous tourist attraction cities in Japan, very close to Kyoto. These deer are everywhere here, and they are dangerous. Watch this poor, unsuspecting soul buy shika senbei (deer crackers) and get completely attacked. He will eventually be tackled. Look at this—it's building up now. There's no way you know where you can go, dude. I think he's done. They smell it on you.

00:00:39 John Daub: I woke up at 6 in the morning, got on the Shinkansen, and got to Nara at 9:02—three hours door-to-door. It's a beautiful sunny day today. I'm coming here to film some pickup shots for a main channel episode. Film that, go back to Kyoto, go to Gion, maybe bring you live over there today. And then take a look at the overtourism situation, which is something I've been covering quite a bit, where they're not allowing people to take pictures of geisha because of geisha harassment.

00:01:08 John Daub: Talking about harassment, these deer are evil, and I'm going to show you over the course of the next—I don't know—until I come. Well, just watch the other people. There's no reason that I need to go buy the senbei. Watch the other people get completely attacked. And this one's got antlers—you can't tell them to back off. They're just going to come right at you. You will hear screams from Western women, like they didn't expect that this would happen, shouting out in English, "Don't touch me there." These are gangster deer, everybody. They are evil, as I said, and I'm about to prove it to you.

00:01:50 John Daub: Don't come this way. Look at that—you're evil. I'm getting out of here. Look, did you see that guy? He just stabbed him in the butt. That was a butt stab—did you see that? He got you good. They do smell. They're going for the cash—that's where the wallet is.

00:02:18 John Daub: Look at this. You have no idea. You think you're taking a picture of something beautiful. Evil—pure evil. That's what evil looks like, folks. In a few minutes, evil might be coming out from this depository here. Alright, let's go buy some shika senbei. I'm about to—I gotta show you how bad this can get here. Here's the shika senbei right here. It's funny that they never get attacked.

00:03:02 John Daub: There are some rules. Little kids should not be feeding them. Be mindful of other deer around you. When you don't have any crackers left, show it by raising both hands in the air—that tells them to get away from me, all gone. There are a lot of rules. One shika senbei, please. One. They just nudged me. Thank you. Oh. I'm going to run away. Yes. Oh no—he was already nudging me. One of them bit my shirt. This is a new shirt.

00:03:56 John Daub: Alright, I've got a whole stack of... This is hard currency in the park, everybody. You know, I am being somewhat facetious calling them gangsters, but they really are. You have no idea. They go for the wallet. One of them went for the bulge in my pocket, which is a wallet. They see the crackers. This is 200 yen, or about a dollar forty or so. And just be careful with this. Look—they already see this. Alright, if you want this, you're going to have to jump the fence. Jump the fence. Do a trick. Do a trick. Oh, oh, oh—oh jeez. Okay, wait—that turned aggressive quickly. It smells like a zoo.

00:04:42 John Daub: Alright, this is Nara Park. I want to show you where I am exactly on the map here. You can see it's very close to Nakatanidou (mochi shop), which is the place where they pound the green mochi. That's very close to here—about a ten-minute walk. There's a beautiful Starbucks, dare I say it, by the lake on the way from there. And then Nara Park is on the way to Todaiji, where you must stop. Just be mindful of kids—seriously. This is not looking pretty. Here's where we are. I came from Kyoto on Kintetsu Nara Station. Kintetsu is the way to go—I think it's a little bit closer than JR Nara Station. And you can see from this part how close we are to Todaiji. There's the city of Nara, which is what you get when you get out of the station. And then about a ten-minute walk, you get the parks of Nara—beautiful national places like this. There's Nara Park on the left side, and then there's Todaiji on the right. Todaiji is the biggest wooden building in the world, housing the largest bronze Buddha in the world. And that's sort of what I've come here to film.

00:06:04 John Daub: Bro! He's... Look, he's stalking me. Aaron, the Ronin is here. How you doing? Aaron, the camping was rained out, but it was not too bad. Dude, you're gonna get attacked by the big one here. Look, I will give it to you—just give me a second to regroup. I wanna regroup. Back away! I have no more shika senbei crackers. Alright. Dude, if... Apparently they will bow. These crackers are for me. These are my senbei. He's still there—he's there. Look, he's pickpocketing me. I told you, they're gangsters—look at this. This is pure harassment. Do you have any idea? Oh, stop sniffing my rear. Dude! Listen, you fawn. Hey! Don't! Don't! You aggressive freak of nature. But it's stinking—he's smelling me. He wants these here. He's coming after me with all of the... Stalking me. Here—you want some? Come and get it. How high can you jump? Oh, he's backed away. That's right, you better back away.

00:07:54 John Daub: Excuse me? Oh yes—this is the deer biscuit. Yeah, I know. Oh. Thank you for telling me. Thank you for the information. Did he think I was really gonna eat it? I love playing with tourists. I have no idea. Okay. Now, you'll get the deer biscuits, but you must follow simple rules that I have of you. One, do not headbutt me—I've been butted before. It's not nice. Ow! Freak of nature. Dude, back away. Let's see how fa... Oh my God. Oh my God. This is a minefield of crap. Oh my God—this is a minefield of poop. You can't get this... You nudged my arm again. Oh. This is a minefield of poop. Okay, take this and get the heck away. It's all poop in there. Dude, you guys better clean up your freaking act. Just get away from me.

00:09:03 John Daub: Look, it's... You're paying money to be harassed, all right? Too hot... That did not last long. Get away from me—just get the heck away. Just get away. Take it—get away. It's all poop in there. I gotta rub the... Hey, you freaks. Back away. All right, here—take this, you freaking... Okay, bow. Bow. Bow. Bow again. All right, do your bow thing. Okay. All right, you, bow. Dude, he... Oh my God—he got me. Excuse me—tell your girlfriend here to back away, okay? Just take it. Oh my God. Always give one to the big one, and then give one to the little one and run away. Let's give this away to somebody. I'm done. I'm done. It's finished—all finished. They said put your hands up—all finished. Finished. It's finished. Now, don't eat the paper. I'm done—it's all finished. You don't believe... They don't believe me. That's a freaking lie. Look at this—look at this. Did you do this? Supposed to rub your nose in it. It's all done—all done. All done. All done. All done. All done. Back away—all done. All done. John is done. John, done. Look, smell it—sniff it. Sniff it. Smell it. I don't want to touch your greasy head. Dude, when was the last time you took a shower? God, stinks. It's wild.

00:11:13 John Daub: Did you see that? I gave that one kid—did you see that? I gave this one kid, I said, "Here, you take it." He goes, "I don't want it." He's like, she couldn't give... He's trying to give it away to his other friends and none of them would take the freaking shika senbei. Oh my God. I'm telling you, they are... They are not nice. This is the face of evil—I'm serious. Look at how he's standing in the shadow. Stranger danger. All right. I'm telling you, when you come to Nara Deer Park, don't do what they're doing. What do you think you're doing? What is this? You got the antlers—all he's got to do is a little back press there and you're history. Think he wants some person hanging out over his shoulders? And by the way, you're standing in poop—that's all poop over there. Seriously, it's a minefield. I was... Look at the... Do you see it? Do you see it? Do you smell it? It's wafting over here. That's a minefield, ladies and gentlemen. This I'm being serious. It's very hard to get it off of your shoe unless you have like a toothbrush. Don't use your own. Sokan (deer poop chocolate), the forbidden chocolate balls. Yeah. Put it on the toothbrush of the person you like the least. They sell chocolate—they call it shika no fun (deer poop), which is deer poop. You can buy it—they're chocolate balls that look like this. I'm bringing this into your living room. You can buy this confection, and it's hard to tell if it's fake or real—it's quite convincing.

00:13:15 John Daub: But the bottom line is that Nara Park is kind of fun. You know, it's not that far away. Let me show you a little bit about my trip here. So this is Mount Fuji. For the next two minutes, I want you just to... Let's kind of relax here as the deer attack other people. This morning was just a clear view to Mount Fuji. In the summertime, you rarely get to see it because it's either misty or humid and obscuring the view, or it's just cloudy and rainy and it's hard to see. Summer is the worst time for Mount Fuji gazing. But it's June 5th, and you can see in the rainy... Just right before the rainy season, this was a lucky view with some snow still on the top. That snow is going to melt a lot over the next 30 days. And this going past Fuji, it's going to be a lot of snow. And this is Mount Fuji City right here—it's just really cool. This is not sped up—this is the actual Tokaido Shinkansen, the Nozomi Shinkansen to Kyoto speed going through there. And it takes about, I don't know, four minutes or so to get past this part of the Mount Fuji run. It's a beautiful run. If you want to get on a Shinkansen ticket, it's 14,000 yen to get from Tokyo to Nara. You have to change at Kyoto Station—get on the Kintetsu. I highly recommend because the station is much closer than JR Nara, and then you don't have to walk as far. Yeah, it's about 14,000 yen or what is that—80 dollars to get a ticket. It's still yen for me to get a ticket to come here to Nara. And it's certainly better than Tokyo. But I'm telling you right now, I stink now because I touched a deer and they're still looking at me.

00:14:44 John Daub: Dude, I got nothing. Look at my hands—nada. Just get that. Look over there behind your shoulder. Are you? No—get away. Alright, this is Shin-Fuji Station. Oh no, the pigeon just ate the... Oh, don't. Stupid pigeons just ate the... They walked right through it and then one of them ate the poo. These are things you just don't want to see—it's nasty. Stop it, pigeon—shoo, shoo. Alright, we're getting off of the Mount Fuji view. We've already pretty much crossed this transverse, this section of the Shinkansen. We're going to go over the bridge there—you see the bridge over the Fuji River and the view just dies out from there. Those are the pigeons that were eating the poo—they have more energy now, I suppose. All of this senbei. See, there's some screams already. Why are people... They scream, run away and they walk towards somebody else? Is that the way to get rid of them? That's a strategy—if someone's bothering you, walk towards other people. Gangsters. I got nothing—sorry, bro. Don't quit your day job. Here's a tip: Don't run or you become the prey. You need to show the deer who's boss by eating the senbei first before giving it to them. That's so true. Look at this lady in the dress—one antler could rip that right off. Just saying. I'm just saying. And you know what? None of the deer... I think, Chan, you're right about that. None of the deer will get near the shika-senbei stall. Look at it—it's like a bank. Do you see this? It's a bank. These are vaults of shika-senbei—they sell a lot every single day. They're just basically like wafers for... Oh, he just bought... That guy bought a stack—that's like a stack. That's like $10,000—like a stack of hundreds right there. He's not getting mobbed—he's like hiding it. Dude, he's gonna eat it for himself. He's eating it for himself. I don't think he knows that they're for the deer. Why would you buy a stack and then just walk away? Why would you buy a stack and walk away? Look at that—one deer saw him do it. He's gonna be tracking him for a while. He's gonna get robbed. Dude, you're gonna get robbed when you're by yourself around the corner there. Should I keep on this? See if the gangsters get him? I think something is about to happen to somebody we may never see again. He has a lot of shika-senbei—you could survive a good hour on that.

00:18:26 John Daub: I gotta actually get to work. Do you have anything you want to say to the people? No? Nothing? Hey, antlered one. And this lady's keeping the peace here—she's got a broom handle and she's actually keeping the area clean of shika-no-fun. These chocolate balls will be sold to tourists later. Did you see the pigeon just ate the poo? He's helping the lady. And you... Oh my gosh, look over there. She's getting swamped. Five bucks says that she starts... She takes off running through the minefield of poop. She has no idea that her sandals are gone—she's walking through a minefield of poop. It's not worth it. Is she smiling? Because that's a very awkward selfie picture. It's not a very real... You can't have a real smile when you sniff around you and it smells like a zoo. But you're inside... You're on the wrong side of the cage, lady. You're on the wrong side of the cage with that selfie—you're in this deer's pen. Look at this dude's getting swamped right over here. Look, I'm telling you—this lady here. I bet you a deer takes the bag and runs away. I did it all wrong. This could be you if you were here. Oh, they blocked the shot. I got nothing, bro. Dude, no—follow the tourists. Keep moving—move along. That's all, pig. That'll be all.

00:21:01 John Daub: We're not hearing enough screaming. Usually there's screams of horror and terror. I guess every time a train comes, we get groups of tourists who buy the shika senbei. And you hear shrieks, screams, running—mostly women—and some attacks, which are memorable for those watching afar. Why do they bow? Because they know they'll get this one. Let me see—I'll bow to you. Okay, bow. Bow. See, they don't bow just to bow—it's a myth. Hello, young one—bow? They don't bow unless you've got food. I'm bowing to you. Right now, hundreds of people are bowing—can you do it too? No—he's hiding. Look, alright, you don't like being harassed, do you? Huh? Do you like it when people harass you? Trying to hide, huh? It's not that much fun when some humans come in after you. I didn't do anything—it's not that much fun, is it? See? Now, if I were to start sniffing your rear and headbutting you, you wouldn't like that, would you? I think we're done here—we've learned a little bit of something today. Knowledge is power—so are a bunch of biscuits. Alright, I think that's enough silliness for today as I need a cup of coffee. I haven't had my morning coffee—thus John is somewhat unusually weird this morning.

00:22:49 John Daub: There are accidents with deer, but if you do chase them, they will come—they'll run into traffic and hit cars. I've seen it—it's not nice. Don't feed the deer except for the shika senbei—they're designed for them to eat. So just, you have to buy the food, but don't give them your crackers, human foods. Deer can get sick eating trash—they will eat the paper, they'll eat stuff out of your bag. Close your bag—make sure that there's no easy access to other foods just in case. Do not hit or chase the deer, but running away is okay. These acts can be punishable—they are punishable under the Act on Protection of Cultural Property because these deer are cultural property, believe it or not, which is kind of amazing. If you look at the street, just a little bit of a heads up for you—Miyajima is the other place in Japan where we have a kind of deer culture, but the shika senbei booth right here, they have rules that you can read if you want to get more of an explanation. So just don't follow the rules? And I gotta walk to Todaiji and get some work done as a new crop of people... Well, thank you, Ramsey Silent, man with wrench—I appreciate that. I will use it for... Oh, he's just got a... He's getting headbutted. Oh, his friends left him—poor guy. He's trying to do the bow—they did the bow because he has got the food. They're sniffing—what do you got there? What do you got over there? A little bit of that. Put the senbei in your pocket. Uh oh, here they are—now they're all swarming. That's what I'm talking about—just run away. Run away from the gangster deer. It's life or death—you make the wrong decision. All these tourists are walking by—they know better. Stay away from the deer. Whole gang of tourists walked by, ignored the shika senbei, didn't even touch it because they know what happens. When you buy shika senbei, you're going to get ganged up on—it's not pretty. It's just a part of life here. Nada. And yeah, come visit—just make sure you bring some hand sanitizer because none of these deer wash their hair, and if you do touch them, it kind of sticks. I wash my hair. All right, everybody—I'm off. Thanks for watching. I'll see you in another live stream, maybe from Kyoto. After I finish here, I'm heading, making a beeline straight to Kyoto and I'll see you if you're in Kyoto, maybe over there. Matane. Thanks, guys. Thanks for MC Silent. Look at the deer over there. Oh, that's the mascot—that's the creepy mascot of Nara, which is so cool but still, it's creepy. What do you guys think? Matane.